John Hodgett <John.Hodgett@uce.ac.uk>
Date: Tue, 6 Apr 1999 10:17:12 +0100
An alternative to viagra ...
It's a sad fact that many BMW owners are the wrong side of forty.
Alongside the benefits of greater maturity, wealth and wisdom, come some less desirable side effects. Pleasures that were once immediate and spontaneous now take considerably longer, and often require a lot more preparation.
Another unpleasant reality of the ageing process is that the blood circulation becomes less efficient, creature comforts become more appealing, and the mature biker starts becoming susceptible to a variety of conditions that would not have occurred at an earlier age.
At last, help is at hand, with virtually no adverse side effects, that enable some of the pleasures enjoyed in our youthful prime to be revisited. Fumbling around inexpertly in the dark with hands numbed from some serious biking mileage is no fun, especially as exquisite pleasures are promised once the bloody thing is up, but how do you get a quick erection?
The answer isn't a concoction of chemicals swallowed twenty minutes before the act, but a far more palatable combination of nylon and glass fibre available from a firm in Walsall called Khyam, and their solution to the problem lies in a range of "quick erect" tents.
We have all struggled with soggy flapping canvas and unforgiving cold steel poles in a wet and windy campsite in North Wales struggling to get the thing up, when all it wants to do is impersonate a hang glider. The thought of a B&B seems so tempting, especially as the thought of taking the bloody thing down again is equally unattractive.
Well forget it. Buy yourself one of the brilliant range of Khyam tents and enjoy the freedom of camping without the hassles. The tents literally are habitable in less than thirty seconds, and are about as difficult to put up as the average umbrella. To add icing to an already attractive cake, they pack small, are light, robust and waterproof – what more could a biker want for that weekend rediscovering lost pleasures.
At first sight, the instructions reminded me of my first dip into a Haynes manual before ripping the floats out of my old boxer's Bings, but once digested, putting up my Khyam Sierra became self explanatory, and soon I was settling down to a well earned brew. Like the old design adage – if it looks right, it probably is right, and the tent's shape, materials and construction not only offers lots of space, but more importantly, it's in the right place. Some other tents I looked at before going for the Khyam seem to have been made for dwarf quadrupeds, with loads of space that can't be properly utilised by human shaped creatures. The usable interior space of the Sierra is approximately seven feet long, six feet wide and four feet high (or 211cm x 185cm x 120cm for our Euro friends), plus a generous bell end entrance for soggy boots, over-trousers, gloves, etc, etc. The Sierra weighs in at under 4kg, and fits neatly in its own travel bag that straps comfortably onto my top box.
Khyam recommend that a stone protection sheet is put down under the ground sheet, and this makes a lot of sense in terms of saving wear and tear, plus it keeps the whole show much cleaner for future adventures.
Their range goes from the compact and affordable Sierra 2/3 person model up to the luxurious Ultradome – big enough to hold most of the West Mercia Section plus their bikes!
More information can be gleaned from Khyam Leisure Ltd on 01922 711310
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